Hi its Haley!!! I'm going to try this again!!!

Wow, I feel like i'm starting over!!! Well maybe not starting over but getting a chance to try again.

I recently was able to pay off all of my debt other than the house and my lease it up on my car so I need to get a new car but otherwise besides just the regular bills (gas, electricity, satellite, food, cell phones) i don't have any debt!! What an amazing feeling!!!

I still feel a little bit scared though... I don't want to rake up debt again... i'm pretty sure I won't have another chance like I had this time to pay everything off and still have money left over to put in savings for the future.

besides getting a new car soon, i have to get a new driveway, and get my bathroom finished and the backsplash in the kitchen done.  after that I think I've done pretty much as much work on the house as i'm going to do unless i end up staying here forever which is not the plan!!!!

I'm trying to figure out the best way for me to lose weight.  I have gained a lot in the last couple of years i think with the stress of the divorce and my thyroid going crazy but now I have to try to get it off and its not an easy thing to do.  I'm having  hard time figuring out what is the best way for me to do this.  I've tried the HCG diet in the past, more recently I've done Medifast a couple of times and I have just started Plexus.  I really hope this helps because I'm not having a lot of luck sticking with Medifast but when I'm not on it I tend to be a binge eater.    Ahhhhh.

I've said to people lately, its so hard to go your whole life being skinny and then all of a sudden your FAT.  Its embarrassing.  I don't want to see people especially if I haven't seen them for a while.  I don't want to leave my house.  I don't want my kids to be embarrassed by their mom which i don't think they are but I would hate for them to feel that way.

I hate going into to a restaurant or taking the kids for ice cream and feeling like people are looking at me wondering why I am there eating food or ice cream which I clearly don't need.  Obviously people don't know my struggle and what has been happening in my life but they always judge without knowing.

Anyway.....

Its time to decide what I am going to do with my future....

I love Nerium and know that it can make my life amazing but until i really get it going I need to be doing something else to bring in money.  Changes.....what to do..... Real Estate school? I've thought about taking a course to become a group fitness instructor... (why not kill 2 birds with one stone).  I'd really love to go to interior design or photography school.  What to do.....


But what it really comes down to  is i'd just like to live a happy life with my kids.  Move back home to Utah, maybe find a husband. Just be happy!

My Kitchen Re-Do

I moved in to my house about a year and a half ago and this is a horrible picture of what my kitchen looked like.  It was very very outdated with purplish/mauve cabinets, teeny tiny double ovens that wouldn't fit a normal size cookie sheet, no disposer, and hardly any cabinet space with no pantry space at all!!! And so the work began! 

We completely gutted the entire kitchen down to the studs on almost all the walls and parts of the ceiling and started over.  Now, I believe I bought the house from the original owner who was something like 96 years old when she moved out and I'm pretty sure everything was almost original including the dead mice we found hardened behind the sheet rock that we pulled out.  Yuck! 

These two pictures are how the kitchen looks now except these pictures were taken before I put the cabinet hardware on.  Don't mind the mess i'm still working on washing all the dishes and figuring out where to put everything.  I have so much more cabinet space now I don't know what to do!!!

So, I went to Home Depot and had somebody come out to the house and help me redesign the kitchen.  Once we figured out how we could lay it out with more cabinet space I ordered unfinished cabinets that I could finish myself.  Wow, what  a hard decision trying to choose what color to paint them.  I really wanted a fun color like yellow or grey but went with this antique white just thinking about resell value as I know I won't be in this house forever.  

I had to pull up all of the lanoliem that was on the floor which was a horrible job because there was so much glue and staples that had to pulled out and scrapped off that it took months really.  I really didn't want hardwood like the rest of the house and really wanted a checkerboard kitchen floor but couldn't find the colors and kind of tile I wanted so I opted for ceramic tile that looks like hardwood and I really love it and it goes well with the new cabinets.  Yay for all new appliances except for little handprints on the stainless steel that has to be cleaned off constantly.  

I'm so happy this is almost over!!!!

Social Media Kinda Sucks

Don't you hate it when you get on Facebook or Instagram and you see all your fun mommy friends doing things that make you feel bad that you weren't invited or like they have a way more exciting life that you do?

 I have alway had a very jealous personality and I hate it.  I try not to let things bother me but they still do.  Sometimes i'm ok but other times are harder.  Its kinda like "well even if I can't go for whatever reason, it would be nice to have still been invited ".  Then I start over thinking things like "oh well, maybe I'm not as good of friends with that person as I thought I was".....

Whatever.....

I was telling my 14 year old daughter today that even when you are a mom you still sometimes have problems with friends or feel left out or are made to feel bad.  Just because you're almost  40 years old that doesn't stop.  You still have feelings and especially when you live away from home and family it can be even harder to see other people out having a great time while you are sitting at home staring at your computer screen.

I would love to hear everyones else's thoughts on this!!!!!

Monogram Mousepad

I had this horrible Office Max mouse pad that i have had for-evvvv-er.  it was coming apart around the edges.  Has been spilled on, written on, ripped up who knows what else... so I decided rather than buying one from someone else or having someone else design me a new one I would try it myself.

Super easy~ I just picked a digital paper and opened it in photoshop.  Choose my font (EcuyerDAX, for this one) and designed my super easy Monogram.  

Remember this was my first try and I think next time I will make my circle and Monogram a little bit smaller but for a mouse pad.......no biggie and I think its pretty cute.  

I sent it to costco to be made and a few days later for under $10 I have a new super cute mouse pad!!!